...would win in a fight, battle royale style, between Rivers, Brian, Pat and Scott?

Also, who would be the first to cry?

Discuss.


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Brian kills Scott, Pat kills Brian, Rivers kills Pat, then Rivers and Matt have an enormous lightsaber duel.
Pat and Scott would end one another. Too equally matched.

Rivers and Brian would face off and probably try to take it easy on one another at first, then Brian would use his famous fatality: "The B string"
It would flash out of the palm of his hand and skewer rivers through the subclavian, Brian would shout "Come here!" and yank Rivers to him and then end it with a combo uppercut grab that would remove the skull/spine together.
A deep voice would proclaim "Fatality!" and Brian would walk away the victor, because he's one bad wiry little dude.
You don't want none of "The B string", son.

First to cry? Brian, because even though he's a mutant guitar slinger cage fighter, he still loves his friends.
True story:
A few years ago I saw James Hetfield (of Metallica) pull a balisong (butterfly knife) on one of Weezer's roadie/bodyguards backstage in Charlotte (Atlanta maybe?). It was somewhere in the Southeast.
The bodyguard was standing there wetting himself as Hetfield is screaming 2 inches from his face about what he going to do with that knife. Total raving psychotic off his meds and out of the psych ward stuff.
Bell strolls over with his guitar strapped on because he JUST came offstage, calmly grabs the knife from Hetfield with the kind of dexterity only a lead guitarist that doesn't just play power chords has. He flips it closed in a masterful series of deft movements, glances at it, and then whacks Hetfield in the nose with it and coolly says "You shouldn't play with knives."
James grabs his nose and starts crying and Lars ushers him back to the room reserved for Metallica while muttering something about "ninja nerds" under his breath.
The roadie/bodyguard collapsed in a heap on the floor and just sat there shaking and crying while profusely thanking Brian for what surely had just saved him from being gutted like a catfish.
Brian dropped the knife in his lap and walked back into his dressing room without a word.

Everyone there was stunned speechless. Rivers came through the curtain right after that and seemed confused by how quiet and tense it was aside from the sobbing 350 lb man on the floor.

Brian is wicked fast and very dangerous.
this wins so far

Sovereign Andy said:
Pat and Scott would end one another. Too equally matched.

Rivers and Brian would face off and probably try to take it easy on one another at first, then Brian would use his famous fatality: "The B string"
It would flash out of the palm of his hand and skewer rivers through the subclavian, Brian would shout "Come here!" and yank Rivers to him and then end it with a combo uppercut grab that would remove the skull/spine together.
A deep voice would proclaim "Fatality!" and Brian would walk away the victor, because he's one bad wiry little dude.
You don't want none of "The B string", son.

First to cry? Brian, because even though he's a mutant guitar slinger cage fighter, he still loves his friends.
this fails because he would not say, "come here!".....he would say "get over here!"

hintofcoolness said:
this wins so far

Sovereign Andy said:
Pat and Scott would end one another. Too equally matched.

Rivers and Brian would face off and probably try to take it easy on one another at first, then Brian would use his famous fatality: "The B string"
It would flash out of the palm of his hand and skewer rivers through the subclavian, Brian would shout "Come here!" and yank Rivers to him and then end it with a combo uppercut grab that would remove the skull/spine together.
A deep voice would proclaim "Fatality!" and Brian would walk away the victor, because he's one bad wiry little dude.
You don't want none of "The B string", son.

First to cry? Brian, because even though he's a mutant guitar slinger cage fighter, he still loves his friends.
you sir, are correct!

blakesp26 said:
this fails because he would not say, "come here!".....he would say "get over here!"

hintofcoolness said:
this wins so far

Sovereign Andy said:
Pat and Scott would end one another. Too equally matched.

Rivers and Brian would face off and probably try to take it easy on one another at first, then Brian would use his famous fatality: "The B string"
It would flash out of the palm of his hand and skewer rivers through the subclavian, Brian would shout "Come here!" and yank Rivers to him and then end it with a combo uppercut grab that would remove the skull/spine together.
A deep voice would proclaim "Fatality!" and Brian would walk away the victor, because he's one bad wiry little dude.
You don't want none of "The B string", son.

First to cry? Brian, because even though he's a mutant guitar slinger cage fighter, he still loves his friends.
The obvious choice(s) would be either Pat or Scott...and I would go with Scott. However; Rivers is way underestimated. He is like Avatar "The Airbender" or Yoda. I believe he can either: A) beat the entire band up without touching them or B) make the entire band think they are beaten up by using mind control. Rivers would be the first to cry though. After taking "the force" or "the elements of the Earth" and using his powers for bad instead of good, he would cry about unbalancing the universe.
I don't know people, you can't put smaller guys down! I'm 5'6" and can get very scrappy, even wily! Rivers for the win!!

And Pat would cry first, cause of a busted knee or shin from a hash pipe type kick from Rivers!
For some reason, I have a feeling that Scott would win, and Brian would be first to cry, even though Rivers would lose. Here is what I think would go down:
1st: Scott
2nd: Pat
3rd: Brian (Cryer)
4th: Rivers

No disrespect in any way to any of the members of Weezer whatsoever.
I would sleep with Pat because he has such broad shoulders but seems like he would have the soft touch of.. wait what was the question again?

Oh yeah, fight, see... Scott was a marine.


hintofcoolness said:
you sir, are correct!

I get no points for a sub zero reference? Come ON! :0)

Tyler Durden said it best: Skinny guys fight til they're burger.
meditation doesn't give you fighting ability. Neither does soccer. You can be in the best shape in the world and also be the worst fighter in the world. That being said i say Scott probably wins because he's the only one that knows how to fight (at least as far as we know). Pat is #2 because he's the most likable, and Rivers a close 3rd because he looks like he has an inner rage about him. Brian last.


placemats said:
I think you guys are underestimating Rivers. He's got the whole "mind over matter" thing going on via Vipassana. And he plays soccer which requires great stamina and physical fitness. I think it would come down to the rough and tumble Scott vs. Rivers

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