You gotta know at least one. Here's mine:

23% of all photocopier problems are caused by people sitting on them to photocopy their butts. 

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Charlie Brown's father was a barber.
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
that huge ass earthquake in chile earlier this year knocked the earth's rotation off by 3 inches, resulting in days shorter by 1.26 microseconds
chimpanze's are the only other creature thats performs oral sex for pleasure :P
barrow is the only place in England to make submarines


and yes i still owe people some, please be patient

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